Paraphrased from the current McLeans magazine:
So, it seems that 25% of people with smart phones or tablets are stupid enough to store sexually intimate pictures or vids on their devices. OK. Look around you now and start wondering what’s on the devices in some pockets. Now, it doesn’t say that it’s pictures of self or “Friends”, so a lot of it may just be stored porn. Ummh. Next time a co-worker or fellow student leaves to visit the rest room….
Here’s a clip from Piers Morgan’s interview with Ben Shapiro around the date of Jan. 10. Whether you agree with Shapiro or not, he is a fantastic debater and, as the title suggests, “owns” Morgan. Watch as Morgan squirms when accused of “standing on the shoulders of the dead” to make his point. I am sympathetic to gun control activists, but even I can see the point that Shapiro is trying to make. It’s true. If a guest’s opinion on gun control differs from Morgan’s, he tries to make them look guilty for ignoring the death of innocent children. The Newtown deaths were a terrible tragedy, but were also a virtual drop in the bucket compared to child deaths from handguns or from countless other social ills, like poverty. To put them in the centre spotlight is a valid emotional response, but not a rationally sound one.
Watch Morgan change the subject when Shapiro’s arguments cut through the hypocrisy that Morgan’s been spouting for the past months. Watch Morgan desperately try to control himself when finally faced with a pro-gun person who wasn’t hand picked because he or she was a nut job. Watch Morgan sidestep the important questions which are brought up with Shapiro, deflecting them with his usual tactic of ignoring direct question that are posed to him and retreating to talking points much like a Republican leadership nominee or two.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it here, again. As long as the anti-gun people insist on resting their arguments on emotional foundations, there is not likely to be a change. Moderates will look at Morgan’s interviews and see it for the emotional swill that it is, thereby siding with the people who are afraid that misguided liberals are going to take their guns away and tell them what they should and shouldn’t do.
Bad tactics.
In my previous entry called “Fifty Shades of Porn” I predicted that Fifty Shades of Grey was going to do for media what “Animal House” did decades ago. “Animal House” normalized stupidity; Fifty Shades of Grey normalized sex/porn.
This year’s Sundance Film Festival leads the way. Whether it be a movie about gay bars, the biopic about Linda Lovelace or a film about two mothers trying to seduce each others’ sons. And then there’s “Don Juan’s Addiction”, which speaks for itself. It’s a social commentary film which “…takes measure of a society that objectifies sex until nothing about it is personal.” (Rolling Stone Review)
In addition you have the landslide of soft core porn novels which want to stand on the shoulders of Fifty Shades. S&M has become quaint. Exhibitionism common place.
Is this necessarily a bad thing? My personal values are far from prudish, but, like “Animal House”, when particular values become normalized and begin a domino effect through our popular cultural standards, there will be consequences. In the normalization of stupidity, we’ve seen it fuel a cultural attitude which allows the ridicule of intelligence and reason.
Do we want a normalization of sex or porn in a society where easy Internet access has 11 year olds watching porn on their smart phones at school lunch hours and texting or skyping vids of themselves masturbating to friends and strangers? Do we want it to de-personalize sex to the point it no longer falls within the realm of privacy? As one young teenage student said to me during a sex-ed class, “They’re called private parts for a reason.”
I don’t have a problem with sexual themes in the arts, but as I’ve said before, when it comes to youth being exposed to these things, we then have the possibility of this “normalization” impacting socialization and what is perceived as normal behaviour. Cheapening sexual behaviour is not in anyone’s interest (-except maybe those chasing cheap sex – although I’m not sure we want to social reinforce that kind of behaviour on a grand scale-). I know I’m sounding judgmental here, and I don’t want to sound puritan, but I think that some of the social attitudes currently being advocated and supported by the Internet are not in our best interest.
In several of his books Colin Wilson makes reference to the writer Graham Greene playing Russian Roulette with a loaded pistol. The experience, he says, focused the intensity of life so as to lift him out of his depression and feeling of hopelessness.
I think many of us have had a similar feeling in cases where we’ve had to deal with a dangerous or life threatening situation. I think, though, that few go to the lengths of playing Russian Roulette. Danger supercharges our positive feelings about life, especially if we’re feeling hopeless or meaningless.
I think that it is very easy for people to fall into that negative mental space of nihilism in our modern society. We force ourselves to ignore atrocities that exist in the world even though they are force fed to us in glorious live action on the TV screen, all the while wondering who’s going to win American Idol and will those two judges who can’t get along cause a scene on tonight’s episode. Those who are supposed to bear the flag for integrity routinely drop it. Banks wipe out entire pension funds and are rewarded by the government to do it. (Check out last week’s Rolling Stone!!) Cynicism and skepticism are both quite warranted. It would be easy to decide that life doesn’t make sense and that individuals are invisible and have no say.
In David Chronenberg’s Cosmopolis there is a scene at the end where an assassin about to shoot a famous banker says that it’s not about the money or the wealth. He just wants his life to mean something, …to be noticed. He feels invisible, watching other people live their lives and wondering how they do it. You get the same feeling from the movie God Bless America, where the main character is driven insane by the sheer pointlessness of life before going on his killing spree.
Not all, but many of the mass shootings are caused by the same thing that caused Greene to play Russian Roulette. It is the desire to feel something real and lift oneself out of the fog of perpetual sleep. It is the desire to do something that’s noticed. It is an artifact of a society that in some cases encourages that kind of nihilism in people.
I hastily add that, no, I don’t feel that way. Have no fear. And there are many others who don’t either. But it is a reality for some, and I know a few, at a variety of ages. When you see Cosmopolis or God Bless America you can see how the insanity of our society can have a brain numbing effect on many people.
But then there’s Happy Feet. Well maybe, but some would say that it’s just brain numbing in a different way.
ANOTHER NEWLY WRITTEN SECTION THAT I JUST HAD TO SLIP INTO THE BOOK BEFORE CALLING IT DONE.
Tom Sawyer knew the secret of life. He was able to take a tedious task like painting a fence and turn it into a joyous event. He did it by simply changing the way people were thinking about the task, tricking them into thinking of it as something special rather than just an ordinary task. He was successful with others, but was unable to apply the same trick to himself, using it only as a way of getting out of work. By simply shifting their attitudes through trickery he managed get a whole group of people to happily paint his fence for him.
There is something crucial to be learned from that. The lesson is, if you’re bored or depressed, just change the way you think about it. Just choose not to be bored. Sound too simple to be true? OK, so let me complicate it a bit for you.
Colin Wilson uses the analogy of an archer to explain how we live our lives. “Perception is intentional. You fire your perception like an arrow at a target. … But if you don’t pull back the bowstring far enough, if you’re feeling tired or lazy, then the arrow merely falls at your feet and everything looks dull or boring.”
What does “perception is intentional” mean? Intentionality is like a combination of awareness and effort. The more you direct your attention and the more effort you put into it, the more intentionality you have and the more interesting things are. An interesting life doesn’t just happen; you have to work at it. Life has the meaning that you give it through the things that you do, so it should be no mystery that if you don’t do anything it will seem meaningless. If you don’t engage in life, the archer begins to feel invisible and we “lose ourselves”.
So to return to the archery analogy, you have to have an archer who chooses a target, pulls back the bowstring, aims and releases the arrow to find the target. Each part is important. The whole process awakens the archer, which is the part of your mind that has will power. Some philosophers call it the “Transcendent Ego” or the “Essence”, but it is just the part of you which has will power as opposed to just acting or responding automatically.
We can and do act automatically a lot of the time. It’s a good thing, as then we don’t have to make choices about every single thing in our lives. But some people are on automatic pilot all of the time. They’re like a silver ball in a pinball game, …and the flippers don’t work. There is no archer or arrow. Life just happens, and then they wonder why nothing is interesting or why things go wrong. In spite of the fact that much of our lives happens automatically, we do have choice and will power when we need and want it. It takes effort and awareness to use it.
The pulling of the string is the effort, and if we don’t put enough effort into life, the arrow falls at our feet. The aiming is our awareness, and if we don’t exercise that, our arrows fly wildly in all directions and we don’t really accomplish anything. Awareness produces a bigger, more interesting world with attainable goals.
Those people that either don’t engage their energy or leak it all over the place, sink to a low level of interest because their will power, their awareness and their effort all go to sleep. Their energy and their lives stagnate and they become bored and more lazy. It’s a difficult state of mind to get out of. Many get out of it through alcohol, drugs or even sex, although these things often just contribute to the leakiness (along with self pity, anger, overeating and lots of other things) while clouding both effort and awareness. (Sex can be a great way to mobilize personal energy and engagement, though it tends not to work well all by itself.)
How do you escape from this low level of interest, this attitude that feels that the world is a dark, boring place? Getting sluggish energy flowing is difficult, but there are several ways to do it.
Most cars nowadays have an automatic transmission, but I learned to drive a standard and my first few cars all had a standard transmission. There’s a trick that you can pull off with a standard transmission that doesn’t work with an automatic, so I don’t know how many will relate to this analogy. When the battery is low or dead in a standard car, so that it doesn’t start, you can start it by pushing it. This was usually done by having three or four friends push the car while it’s in neutral or with the clutch down. Once the car achieves sufficient speed you put it in first gear and pop the clutch. This forces the whole drive mechanism to move which will often start the car. It forces enough power out of the generator to fire the spark plugs and start the engine. Once it is started, it will begin to produce its own power and will probably even recharge the battery if nothing serious is wrong. This was called “push starting” a car.
You can push start people too. If someone is in a negative frame of mind, bored and with a pessimistic view of things, their intentionality is low and their archer is invisible. So you push start them, or yourself if you can. You force them or force yourself to get engaged in something. A common way to do this is to go on a trip or an adventure. That’s why people often feel so alive when they’re on vacation. A new responsibility or even a hobby may also work to push start things. Parents like to use sports activities, and they are often effective but can lose their appeal. Also, adventures can be positive or negative. It can be a hike or a camping trip, or sky diving, but it can also be a drug or involvement in something illegal like breaking and entering. I’d recommend the kinds of adventure that don’t lead to additional troubles as that will just land you back in depression and boredom along with draining your energy more. It’s not hard to see, though, how and why people get sucked into exciting situation which are negative in nature. It’s also easy to see that, most definitely, withdrawing from activities and hiding in one’s room is the opposite of a solution to the problem.
On the other hand, if you have a healthy level of interest in the world, it is much easier to raise it to a much higher level, achieving those peak experiences that Maslow talked about. This is a soaring level of interest, clarity and engagement that leads to a great sense of living life positively, and an intense feeling of loving life. You feel woken up. You don’t feel like life is batting you around without you having any control. You feel “in control” and like what you’re doing makes a difference.
I’m hoping that many of the things that follow in this chapter will help to both “push start” teens when they’re down, or also achieve or maintain higher states. How you look at life is definitely a choice. How you choose is important. Not all choices are equal.
Of all the suggestions that follow, pay special attention to Meditation. Colin Wilson states over and over again that the best way to make the archer’s arrow fly strong and true is to learn how to control you energy level so that it is optimistic rather than pessimistic. This can be achieved by forcing yourself to concentrate or meditate, thereby bolstering your awareness and effort. Life is lived intentionally. If you just let it happen, don’t be surprised if nothing happens, or you don’t like what happens to you.
[I am indebted to Colin Wilson for many of the points in this section, along with the archer analogy. The car analogy is mine. I found an interview with Wilson, published by Brad Spurgeon, called “Philosopher of Optimism” to be particularly helpful in focusing these ideas.]
My first serious exposure to meditation came when I went to Tom Brown Jr’s Tracker School’s Philosophy 1 course in New Jersey. It was an introduction to Shamanic meditation as practiced by the Apache Indians. The course was in the middle of the school year, so it was necessary for me to apply for a leave of absence in order to attend. To my surprise, not only did I get the leave of absence, but got it with pay and with an offer for the Board to subsidize my expenses. The Superintendant of school at the time was a rather enlightened individual who had spent a few years in a Zen school in Japan and there therefore had a very positive attitude towards meditation. He hoped that I would be able to apply what I learned in the classroom, -a hope that contrasted sharply with that prevalent just a few years later when a few parents who felt that any sort of meditation was anti-Christian tried to block my use of it in the classroom. Along with his approval he sent to me copies of several studies which originated from O.I.S.I.E. citing the importance of meditation and the development of an inner life in mental health and the development of self esteem. The studies also examined the absence of suicidal thoughts and tendencies in adolescents who had that inner sense developed through meditation. Unfortunately, I’ve been unable to locate references to these studies or I would include them here, but I definitely received and read them many years ago.
I have always thought that there are people who have a sense of introspection and others who have a blind spot when it comes to examining inwards. Some people go through their lives without any sense of self examination or desire for self improvement. Others understand introspection and strive for personal improvement. This is particularly evident as a distinction in adolescents and teens. It is often, but not always, associated with the jump from the pre-rational to the rational state. I remember very clearly going through a “waking up” process at about age 15 which led to a long period of self discovery. It eventually led to my passion for reading books about psychology. Many of my friends at the time also made this leap to rationality, and it was usually accompanied by a sense of introspection.
On occasion, rationality and introspection do not go hand in hand. In those cases you usually find one of two things. Either the rationality devoid of introspection is a very cold form of rationality, calculating and non-empathic, often spilling over to rationalization, or you get the Peter Pan syndrome, where the rationality is trying to break through but is being denied and repressed.
Those adolescents suffering from Peter Pan syndrome, where rationality is attempting to emerge but is meeting resistance from an individual who does not want to face the consequences of maturity, can’t afford too much introspection. As one boy tweeted recently, “Thinking ruins everything.” Introspection becomes uncomfortable because it triggers emerging rationality, which is exactly what a person in this situation doesn’t want. Or it triggers those feedback loops of rationalization which are really just emotional.
Meditation, on the other hand, is perhaps the best way to encourage introspection. It involves exclusive direction of attention inwards, not particularly in a rational manner. As a result it can create a measure of introspection and a development of inward awareness without necessarily triggering rational thought. It can be used by pre-rational individuals, whether they be children, teens or even adults, to create an inner world and attention that later can be more comfortable co-inhabited by rationality. Or it can be a way for those in the Peter Pan situation to face introspection without the threat of rationality. It should be noted, however, that the Peter Pan individuals will still be resistant to meditation if starting it at this juncture of their lives because they “just won’t see the point”. It will be lumped in with the other forms of anti-rational rebellion that often includes education, reading and a common sense attitude to things like drugs and alcohol. It is, however, worth a try, especially if it can be engaged before this rebellious nature gets a strong foothold.
In general, when successfully engaged, meditation is the perfect vehicle for encouraging the development of an inward attention and sense of introspection. These qualities have been shown to be a positive influence in developing self esteem and rational thought most of the time. On the occasions where this introspection is coupled with depression and self consciousness it is often because the other balancing and grounding elements of meditation have not been activated by meditation. These are the non-rational components and benefits of meditation that have to do with harmony and internal stability. Meditation makes room for rational introspection, but that’s not what it’s about. In fact it can do a lot to prevent over-rationalization. It is as much about the clutter that it subtracts from the mind as it is about the room it makes for rational, conscious thought.
This is an excerpt from the book I’ve just finished writing called “Sex, Drugs, Rock & Roll and the Intelligent Teenager”. It is the segment of the book which discusses the benefits of meditation. I’m currently writing a part 2 which won’t be in the book, but adds one very important point to this. I’ll try to publish it tomorrow or the day after.
MEDITATION
Meditation? What? You mean like don’t do anything. Just sit there with your eyes closed, maybe make funny noises. What could be more boring? Give me a chance here. Don’t stop reading yet. Just give me a page or two.
Meditation gets a bad rap because it is so often seen in stereotypical situation involving peace, tranquility, flowers and sitar music. Oh, and lava lamps. Any martial art taken to an advanced level makes serious use of different forms of meditation. Ninjas probably most of all, but many others such as Kung Fu and Karate have a heavy meditation component because they recognise that mind and body are closely linked. Tom Brown, a frequent instructor of Navy Seals in the U.S., includes many components of meditation in his teaching, using it to hone intuitive skills. Tantric meditation and yoga are used to make sex more exciting and intense. Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) is a psychological technique being used by a lot of businesses now, and is really just a form of meditation. Meditation can help you sleep better, remember better, stay illness free and improve your life in many other ways. It’s not just flowers and beads.
One of the most basic ways in which someone can direct attention inwards is through the discipline of meditation. There are various forms. The most simple is to just sit quietly and relaxed, and allow distractions to leave your mind. Often this involves concentrating on just one, lone thing. One of the easiest ways to do this is to count your breaths, 1…2…3…4. and then repeat. So every four breaths you start at 1 again and you just keep repeating this. In the beginning, you’ll find that probably only a minute or two goes by before you’ve lost count and your mind is moving in some weird direction with unrelated thoughts. Then you just go back to counting again, and concentrate on just the counting. When distracting thoughts spring up, you dismiss them, pushing them aside, sticking with the counting. The more you practice, the better you get although distracting thoughts may never entirely go away. But, you may ask, how do I get from there to great sex or Ninja skills? It seems a pretty big leap.
This practice of dismissing distractions and keeping the mind focused on just one thing (or eventually on nothing at all) produces a whole waterfall of interesting side effects. It strengthens powers of concentration. Dismissing distractions is great for everything from improving concentration to helping you sleep at night. It’s relaxing and de-stressing. It is much like sleep in some ways as it allows your mind to sort itself out and move towards a state of balance. You find that other people are not as irritating. In that quiet balanced state you seem to become more receptive and aware of things around you, and also within yourself.
As you go through your daily life your mind is often a chaos of voices that won’t shut up. Sometimes if you want to quietly consider something, your mind won’t let you because those voices just won’t stop. These are the voices of all of the selves, clamouring for attention and wanting a say in whatever you’re doing. They interrupt each other and don’t allow some to speak at all. (The ones they don’t allow to speak may be the most important ones for the situation you’re in.) Few people have discipline in their mind, so the chaos rules, or they just react to situations with automatic responses. Tom Brown states that quieting the mind is like having the water in a pond become calm. In the calm water you can see an accurate, clear reflection of reality. When the wind blows, the ripples in the water distorts the reflection the way that chaotic thoughts distort your perception of reality. Those chaotic thoughts are shadows and other selves overlaying emotions and presuppositions on whatever we see or hear or think. Our brains have this need to make sense out of everything and so often provides that sense and meaning by superimposing presuppositions and emotions. For example, if you go into a room and you see people whispering, if you lack personal confidence you might think that they are talking about you and feel bad. Another person would see it totally differently, just walk into the room and have a great time. Quieting the mind and clearing out distractions help us to clear out the chaotic thoughts and see things uncoloured by our own prejudice.
Clearing out the thoughts that constantly clutter up our minds allows us to also access other parts of our mind that often go unused. I’ve heard many stories of athletes who use meditation to visualize a desired outcome. The one thing that they focus on is not counting to four but rather a particular skill like shooting a basket or scoring a goal in hockey. I’ve read about pole vaulters who will go into a state of meditation and then strongly visualize a successful jump before doing it. Visualizing that action with all of its detail tells the muscles in the body what they need to do to execute the action successfully. It is really telling a deep, subconscious part of our mind what we want it to do, and then getting out of the way and letting it do it. It’s actively reprogramming the subconscious sub-routines that propel us.
We also have strong powers of intuition that often go unheeded or unused. That deep, subconscious part of our mind notices far more subtle things in the environment, such as body language or air pressure or tracks on the ground and is capable of processing that information in a way to help make a decision. You may have a “hunch” or “intuition” that it is going to rain. You may have a “feeling” that you are being watched or that a situation is dangerous. You may have a “gut sense” that you are doing the wrong thing. These are not feelings to be ignored.
As your mind is strengthened by all of these things, by concentration, by relaxation, by improved connection with all parts of your selves and your mind, you will find many other doors beginning to open. You will find your sense of intuition improve. You will find yourself more in control of your emotions. You will find an ability to understand and tolerate other people. Your relationships will improve. Your health will improve. Your decision making will get you to your goals more often. You will have more control over your body, including sexually. Resilience, the ability to bounce back with a positive attitude after a failure, will be strengthened. You will be happier.
People with inner confidence usually project outer confidence. This improves your social life and makes you far less likely to attract negative attention from bullies. If you are approached by bullies, the composure that you would be able to show would make it less likely that the bully would see you as a victim and would probably move on. Teens with confidence are far more likely to be supportive of a victim of bullying because they tend to be more empathetic. And certainly, someone who is more happy with themselves is very unlikely to become a bully. A bully is usually a very unhappy, unbalanced person.
Meditation helps to clear the path of communication with your subconscious mind, which has a lot of control over your body, your emotions and even your thoughts. If your subconscious is happy it is more likely to do what your conscious mind wants. For example, your subconscious mind controls your immune system, which in turn influences your general health and ability to repel diseases. A subconscious that is mad at you or doesn’t understand why you’re working so hard and wants to sabotage you can make you ill. It’s a quick way of solving a problem because you get immobilized. But a proper relationship and balance between your conscious and subconscious selves will produce harmony and everything that goes with it.
After the Newtown tragedy talk about violence in American society has been rekindled. The obvious starting point, understandably, was gun control. Let me make it clear that I am in favour of reasonable gun control, -probably favoring more restriction than we have here in Canada, and it’s pretty restrictive here in spite of the discontinued gun registry.
However the discussion around gun control is full of misinformation and twisted statistics. –And it’s bleeding into other topics as well, like video games. A preoccupation with gun control is blinding people to the more important and powerful causes, because looking at those would be too difficult or radical for society.
The current objective of the gun control lobby is to reinstate the “Assault Weapon” ban in the States. That and more strict control of hand guns.
According to Wikipedia,
“Assault weapon (semi-automatic) refers primarily (but not exclusively) to firearms that possess the cosmetic features of an assault rifle (which are fully-automatic). Actually possessing the operational features, such as ‘full-auto’, is not required for classification as an assault weapon; merely the possession of cosmetic features is enough to warrant such classification as an assault weapon. Semi-automatic firearms, when fired, automatically extract the spent cartridge casing and load the next cartridge into the chamber, ready to fire again; they do not fire automatically like a machine gun; rather, only one round is fired with each trigger pull.
In the former U.S. law, the legal term assault weapon included certain specific semi-automatic firearm models by name (e.g., Colt AR-15, TEC-9, non-select-fire AK-47s produced by three manufacturers, and Uzis) and other semi-automatic firearms because they possess a minimum set of cosmetic features from the following list of features:
Semi-automatic rifles able to accept detachable magazines and two or more of the following:
Bayonets, silencers or grenade launchers don’t seem to be an issue (and these things could easily be restricted by legislation), so the primary objectionable characteristics of “assault weapons” is their cosmetic appearance. Also of concern is magazine size, but that is something that is easily legislated, and which won’t really make much difference as one can always buy extra magazines and snapping them in to reload is not very difficult. The bottom line is that all the fuss is being made around the appearance of these guns, rather than their function. A regular hunting rifle is still a semi-automatic weapon capable of exactly the same thing as one of these “assault rifles”. Almost all rifles, shotguns and handguns are semi-automatic. The term is thrown around on the media like it is some big deal and that it’s something to especially fear. That’s misdirection and fear mongering, and it is no wonder that the pro gun lobby see that kind of dishonest tactic and fear for their rights. That there be so much talk about form rather than substance seems to be a little immature. Some people seem to resent the appearance of these weapons, thinking that this magically transforms the bearer into a killing machine. No. The killing machine would be just as effective with a regular hunting rifle. That resentment is about style and reflects a certain attitude preference that is also seen in people disapproving of children playing cops and robbers or cowboys and Indians with toy gun, paint ball games, laser tag games or countess other things that simulate warfare or other competitive scenarios.
There have always been people willing to blame elements of our culture for violence and moral decay in American society. In the past they’ve blamed violent video games, TV shows, movies, comic books, rock music and even jazz music. It’s a complex thing, and it is too easy to blame a culture’s devolution on any one thing. Access to guns may make it easier for the person who flips out to cause damage, but can you really say the same about access to cosmetically altered guns? It seems like a red herring. And the reports in the media are now beginning to bring in the topic of video games.
There is no research that links violent video games with developing a violent attitude. There are a few studies that show short term effects, but most of them actually show that there is little long term effect. Short term effect is understandable, like the adrenalin rush you get after watching an action or horror movie. But a few hours later, it’s gone.
Place blame where it belongs. Poverty in our society accounts for a majority of gun obsession and violence. Improper care of the mentally ill is also a factor. Highly confrontational politics causing a culture of blame and judgement is another cause. And I have to say that I’ve met more than one American who told me that he/she owns a gun because they are a good Christian. Distrust. Shallow morality. Poor education. A society that devalues life (not because of the games they play but because of the social policies they support and the wars they wage). Preoccupation with things rather than relationships.
It’s a sick culture and blaming guns is like blaming cars because people haven’t learned how to drive properly or are predisposed to get drunk. Yes cars are far more necessary than guns, but they are also just as deadly a weapon in the wrong hands, and, in fact, are responsible for more deaths than guns.
Other countries don’t have the same problems. Kids play gun games in Canada and European countries. They have as high a market for shooter video games. But the U.S. stands many floors above these other countries in their violence. Canada has as many guns per capita as does the U.S., although they are concentrated in fewer rural rather than urban hands. Yes we have fewer hand guns and far fewer hand gun fatalities. (Actually most of the ones we have are suicides and accidents.) I certainly support our hand gun restrictions and think they should be even stronger. However, that didn’t prevent gang members in Toronto from getting hand guns used in two major shootings last summer. Their hand guns were gotten illegally, and not stolen. Tighter regulation of hand guns didn’t and wouldn’t have prevented those shootings, because the gun regulation was totally irrelevant to the incident. If you want to look for the causes, you have to look elsewhere. Similarly in the U.S., although some gun regulation, like those surrounding hand guns or magazine size, might be a step in the right direction, the journey towards finding a solution to the problem is many, many steps.
Focusing on things like gun control and video games is a good way to get people riled up and divert them from the real issues.
There has been a dramatic downturn in my writing in this Blog, to say the least. Part of the reason for that is that I have been working on longer passages, including a book. I’ll try posting some excerpts from these writings, even though they may be a bit longer than some people would want in a blog post. Here’s one that isn’t in the book, but probably should be.
The way we view reality is called a paradigm. It is the combination of the level of conceptual evolution we’re at, whether we’re pre-rational, rational or trans-rational, our level of moral development, the filters, prejudices and rationalizations that have permeated our thought, and the shadows that tug our emotions in specific directions. These are the things that control how we look at the world and, as a result, what we believe.
Elementary and High Schools are a real pressure cooker for developing relationships and friendships. They spawn friendship cliques, and even sometimes gangs. You have sub-cultures within the high schools that include collections of smokers, pot-heads, ravers, jocks, preppies, Goths, ….and I could go on. Some of these may be dated, but you have the idea. There are also less formal groups, and in Elementary Schools informality is the norm as you don’t have groups of Goths hanging together usually. And yet in the schoolyard it is easy to see certain people gravitate towards each other . The new kid who enteres the school may experiment a little to see where they fit in, but eventually they find their niche, or failing that alter their own standards to fit into the one that comes closest.
The dynamics of all of this is very interesting. It depends on all of the things I mentioned above (and more), but can be described in terms of two factors in particular. Let’s focus on moral development and Integral stage.
As people develop morally, they go through a series of stages. Lawrence Kohlberg presented six stages in his theory of moral development, which are generally accepted by most psychologists. These six stages move from reward and punishment, to self interest to social conformity to following rules to establishing a social contract to having universal principles. One may argue about details here, but the general idea is pretty sound. As adolescents grow up, they progress through these stages, but the progression is not simple.
Adolescents and teens tend to have a fluid, malleable and shifting psychological make-up. Multiple personalities are very active and constantly shifting, experimenting and adapting to new situations. The psyche is not as stable and fixed as it is with adult. Different situations will not only see the predominance of different “selves” but also different stages of morality. In one situation a teen may exhibit a higher level of morality and in another situation it may drop to one of self interest. Conflicts about these different levels are raging in the adolescent’s mind as they attempt to negotiate more stable selves.
This is true for Integral Stages as well. Ken Wilber summarizes Integral Stages using the terms Pre-rational, rational and trans-rational. There are more stages than that, but this is a useful simplification. These stages have more to do with cognitive than moral development. Pre-rational thinkers have a cognitive mindset that does not value or sometimes even accept rational thought. It is either ignored or dismissed. (We see this quite often in various fundamentalist views within our society.) At times adolescents and teens will be quite rational, as when writing an essay or taking a test or obtaining a driver’s license. At other times they will dismiss reason, as when smoking with friends, or engaging in drugs or alcohol. They bounce back and forth between rational and pre-rational as the multiplicity of selves in their heads play out and negotiate power struggles.
A lot of the influence in the outcome of those power struggles comes from a give and take with their social environment. First of all, people in general, but teens in particular, are drawn to others who have a similar moral and cognitive level. This is what initially produces the cliques. However it can work the other way as well. Being surrounded by a crowd with a particular moral and cognitive level will encourage the dominance of the specific selves that best fit in with that crowd. As the younger mind is so malleable, this happens easily in some cases. (Obviously the structure and stability of selves is more developed in some young people than in others, and this will determine the extent of malleability.)
Enter the teenager who is attempting to figure out their own values and yet fit into their social scene. They may think that the only kind of “fun” and “coolness” that they’re looking for can be found in the party scene, which values alcohol and drugs. They may have strong rational and moral components in their selves and feel that they can indulge in the scene and yet maintain their other interests and activities. But in making the decision to enter that party scene it is necessary for them to suspend several higher cognitive and moral standards. They have to go against what they’ve learned about the dangers of drugs and alcohol. They have to break the law. They have to violate the moral standards of authority figures that they hold in respect. They have to sneak around in what they’re doing because they know that society in general does not approve of their decisions and actions. As a result, specific “selves” are brought into play, and these selves are not the ones trying to evolve the higher cognitive and moral values.
Even if the teen is successful in engaging with moderation, the same shift in personality will take place. By rationalizing, the teen has managed to salvage a little more of the rational self and stage, but they are still suspending a lot of their higher functions. More importantly, they are surrounded by people who are doing the same thing, which inevitably leads to a reinforcement of those psychological priorities.
The end result is the person who feels that they have things under control and are showing a more mature moderation in what they are doing, but who still seems to be withdrawing from productive activities and interests in other parts of their lives. The tunnel vision is still there, but in this case is propped up with the rationalization, “I know what I’m doing and I’m just changing my interests.” This is a dishonest statement, -actually more dishonest than the druggie who simply accepts that their priority is the culture of intoxication. This will still lead to a narrowing of life experiences, as the person absorbs the values and priorities of their peers through a reinforcement of the selves with the lower developmental structures. This changing of priorities is likely not a changing as much as it is just a general withdrawal. If an individual gives up sports to learn how to play the guitar, there is probably not a problem. If they are simply withdrawing from activities and there is no discernible substitution then that is the sign of narrowing life experiences. Even a deep relationship with another person, as valuable as that may be, is likely to develop into a co-dependent relationship if it is isolated from other life experiences.
In the end it is not the drugs or alcohol that is causing the problem, but rather the decisions that led to the engagement and the dominant values that surround the person. These dominant values can be verbal, as in statements like “Ew, you’re actually a member of the Rugby Team? Why bother?” or they can be non-verbal, just expressed in patterns of interaction. Decisions and environment. Decisions, because they are the end results of the internal conflict and power struggle of the ‘selves’. Environment, because it activates and reinforces certain selves within the malleable teenager.
With the shrinking of interests and activities also comes the shrinking of life purpose and meaning. Without positive engagement, life becomes less meaningful, focussed and interesting. Boredom is much more likely to rear its head, complicating things further. It becomes a vicious circle. Poor choices are made to combat the boredom because the individual does not realize that the boredom is self imposed. The paradigm has become self destructive, like a serpent eating its tail. Shifting to another paradigm is very difficult.
I believe that the entrenchment of paradigms in this manner is the reason why so much of personal evolution happens in the period between ages 14 and 25. This is the malleable period where Selves are established along with cognitive and moral levels. Once the paradigms are set, like concrete, it is much more difficult to reshape them. Development turns into healing.
In 1978 a landmark movie was released that would change the face not only of film but of western culture. The movie was National Lampoon’s Animal House and it began a trend of movies that were unheard of before its release. Riding on its coat tails was everything from Revenge of the Nerds, to Airplane to Porkys to, most recently, The Hangover. It was the glorification of stupid. It was permission to look at vulgarity, ignorance and slobbishness (slobitude? slobbery?) as not only acceptable but also as desirable. As with most such pivotal points, the subject has become a little more refined over the years, but the central sentiment still remains. (You see this in Punk, where the viciousness drained out of it after a few years, but the energy and spirit remained.) I recall a noticeable shift in social norms as well. It was a long awaited vindication for the ignorant and an excuse for those who were into wild, mindless partying. It was a glorification of ignorance which, I feel, was at least partially responsible for the rejection of intelligence in American society. (It is interesting to note that the movie bombed outside of N. America and Australia, where this glorification of the ignorant does not seem to exist to anywhere near the same degree.) It was a sociological event.
I believe that we are at a similar pivotal point with the release of Fifty Shades of Grey. Since the rise of the Internet, the porn industry has flourished. When I was a kid, porn was a few magazines hidden under the bed, and, if you were really lucky, sneaking a look at your friend’s dad’s 8mm movies one night when the parents were out. Porn became more accessible with recorded media such as VHS and DVD, but still was tucked away from most people and especially from kids. The recent access to the Internet has changed that. In the past five years, increased Internet access through smart phones and tablets, plus the fact that many teenagers have a laptop in their room, not to mention adults having unrestricted access, has resulted in easy access porn for everyone. Not only that, but anything with a camera attached provides the opportunity to make your own personal porn, leading to all kinds of sharing among people of all ages. Yes video sexting is real and wide spread. If you can get a teen or young adult to talk honestly, they’ll tell you that porn is pervasive.
I believe that this has an impact on our society, in fact I’m certain of it and will post something at a later date that explains that. I don’t want to get into whether this is a good or bad thing in this post as it would require an oversimplification of the issue. Suffice it to say that it is a reality.
And then comes Fifty Shades of Grey, a novel which is not only regarded as poorly written porn, but also one which deals primarily with sado-masochistic themes. In spite of repeatedly terrible reviews, it becomes a sensation, getting a lot of mention and discussion on TV and radio. It is the legitimization of porn, giving rise to a new term, “mommy porn”. People talk about it opening up new and healthy dialogue about sexuality, but that’s kind of like people saying that violent movies are a social commentary on violence. The reality is much more obvious. This kind of book, which used to be in the back of the store with the Romance novels, now gets front row centre billing. It is really just Harlequin Romance juiced up a lot with more graphic sex. And it is the graphic sex which seems to be giving it its legitimization, -being somehow profound or socially significant. The end result will be the legitimization and normalization of porn. Like the legitimization of vulgarity with Animal House, it will evolve and become more tempered as it insidiously permeates our culture. This is not a value judgement on sexuality, or even on sexuality and youth; it is just a statement about how a particular phenomenon is capable of infiltrating our cultural psyche.
Right now it is seen as an adult phenomenon, but with porn not only being accessible to the young, but probably more accessible, this normalization of porn will have ripple effect through our society. We already see it in a normalization of various sexual behaviours in young people. The release of Fifty Shades… will likely be viewed in twenty years as a turning point in sexual standards and attitudes. Whether that is a good thing or a bad thing is a matter worthy of considerable debate. But it is likely inevitable.
I agree that it is not fair to compare most Christians to the wackos at Westboro Baptist Church. They are extreme fundamentalists and quite honestly really have to be regarded as emotionally or mentally disturbed. Criticizing them cannot be legitimately regarded as a criticism of Christianity in general.
But recently, nine year old Josef Miles did something that causes me to consider another unavoidable criticism of the Christian community. Don’t get me wrong. Josef did something commendable and admirable. This is, certainly, no criticism of his action.
When Josef and his mother happened past one of the Westboro demonstrations, seeing all of the hateful posters on display, he made his own little poster that simply said “God Hates No one”. Whether you agree with his religious beliefs or not (and I don’t), you have to admire his thinking. If fact, you have to ask yourself, where were the other Christians in the neighborhood. Why weren’t they out there, like this young boy, making clear that these hate mongers aren’t representative of their own religious beliefs? In fact, why has there been little noise made by decent Christians all over the country?
Silence is damning. Silence suggests agreement, and I have to say that I truly believe that, while most decent Christians would never admit to agreeing with Westboro, or condone their methods, the core of Christian fundamentalism would probably find a fair bit of overlap with Westboro’s placards. Christians may not protest against Westboro because it is awkward when you have to admit that you have at least a partial agreement. While they may not feel that “God hates fags”, they would still have strong moral objection to gays and a majority would likely feel that they are doomed to burn in Hell. Silence is damning.
If Christians truly believe that their religion is about love, they need to protest the mutilation of their faith. They need to do so with the same passion that they use when speaking against abortion, gay marriage and many other issues. It’s like the “Pro-Life”, anti abortionists fighting tooth and nail for the sanctity of life and yet not supporting anti-war, anti-poverty and other life saving initiatives, -or not seeking out orphaned children to adopt. Religious conviction based on convenience is a bit hallow.
Christians need to end their silence about such hateful churches. Until they do, nine year old Josef will be a better Christian than any of them.
One day, much like today, I was leaving early in the morning and noticed that all of the blossoms on the apple tree had fallen during the night and were carpeting an area of the lawn. As I watched, a fox emerged from the trees. The following poster is a poem I wrote that grew from that moment, and then added to a picture I’d taken previously.
Click on image for larger size.
